It's wacky out here in the burbs. Real Stories brings you the funniest, most absurd and stranger-than-fiction real stories from all over America. Stories that can only happen in the burbs. We, the B-Team, provide original headlines, plus our own crazy Burbia "takes" on the stories. Send us your stories too. If they meet Burbia's stringent standards (e.g., they make us laugh), we'll tee up them too.

Finally Something Useful for Dog Poop

Australia

B-Take: Leave it to drug smugglers to figure out that all that dog poop on the lawn -- and the bottom of your shoes -- can serve a useful purpose: smeared all over illicit drugs, it can shield them from detection even from the most expert law enforcement drug (and poop) detectors: dogs. Yeah, they can't smell through their own poop -- who knew?; only this time apparently they did, and the 2 nabbed bandits will be spending years in the pooper (er, slammer)....see the full story.

Same Stupid Sign Stolen Five Times

Wilmington NC

B-Take: The sign is on a North Carolina road. It says: Barstow CA 2554 miles. It's funny that way. See? You're in NC, you're probably not going to be heading to Barstow from that road. So funny that locals have been stealing the sign as fast as NC officials can replace it. So, new decision: No more taxpayer money will be spent replacing the sign. Fool me once, shame on you; fool me 5 times...vote me out of office? ...see the full story.

Ugliest People In World? The British

London UK

B-Take: At least according to results of a new online dating service which accepts only the world's most "beautiful" people. In fact, Russian men fare worse than their British counterparts; but since Russian women are way more attractive than British women (according to the service's discerning voting members), the Brits still "win" overall. ...see the full story.